As simple as a change of heart.

Why is the best fruit always forbidden?

Have you ever fallen for someone that you know you shouldn’t have? Maybe you tried hard to fight your feelings, but you just couldn’t stop what they were telling you. It’s tough though, to hide them every single day, especially when you know that you want to shout to everyone from the rooftops about the new person in your life. Isn’t a part of a new love exposing everything about yourself, almost to the point of potentially being hurt by someone that you think you trust? You fall deeper with each passing day, don’t you? They’re only a friend though, nothing will happen. You keep on saying to yourself that you don’t want anything to occur, but you know that you behave differently when you meet their eyes. You’re not being honest with yourself. You keep telling yourself that it isn’t right.

What if they’re out of bounds, if they’re completely out of your league? They’re too beautiful, loads of people want to be with them. Zero chance. The kicker is that she’s married and her husband is a famous footballer. It was not fucking cool at all. He couldn’t help it though, much as he wanted to.

No matter how many beautiful people that you set your eyes upon, if you’ve already set your heart on someone, do you even notice anyone else?

She was a secret crush. She’s beyond beautiful, smart, funny and she’s super chilled. She swears like a sailor, she’s basically the complete package. Most important of all though, she’s kind and she’s generous, not just to other people but with her thoughts and her feelings.

A glance turned into a stare. It was impossible for them to be together, to be anything at all. Try and hide it, so that no one can see? Not a chance. Pretending forever? Not a chance. You tell everyone that you’re just friends, that you’ll never be anything more. Again, you can never show your feelings though. Maybe you don’t want them to know because your friendship can’t be risked over this. What if she was the one doing the chasing though?

Maybe you don’t need a girl or a boy who says that they have to have you. Maybe you just need that person who says that they’re afraid to lose you.

It’s so hard but sometimes, you have to question your instincts and choose a different path. It’s not always that easy, everyone gets that. All he knew for sure is that they were on a course to somewhere, and it was nigh on impossible to know where they would end up.

Everyone kept telling him how they thought that she felt. They said that she didn’t care, but she never showed him that she didn’t. They told him that she didn’t love him. They kept telling him that she was no good, but he was the only one who saw something different in her and nobody understood why. He looked in her eyes and he knew that there was something there.

One day, she kissed him. Isn’t it true that sometimes all you need is just a second of courage? He kissed her back.

They got together and it was incredible. He fell hard. All he wanted to do, all of the time was to be with her. Grab her hand, wrap his arms around her, cuddle her. Send her flowers, leave little notes in her bag when she visited him or when he visited her. Compliment her on how astonishing she was. Isn’t that what all of us should want? She asked him exactly how he felt, she demanded complete honesty. He told her that he loved her and she breathed out, and told him that she loved him too. She was holding her breath, waiting to listen to the words that she was desperate to hear leave his mouth.

For however many reasons there might be why they got together, there were always more reasons why they shouldn’t have. Although he was a tad naive, he knew that it would be tough, that there would be obstacles to overcome. He wanted to be with her for the rest of his life though. Forever. Forever ever. All is perfect in their world now, right? No.

One day came along, and she said no, she said that she didn’t want the same things from him as he wanted from her any more. As she told him, he felt like his ribs had clamped shut. It was like bullets hitting him behind the eyes, everything was not as it should have been. Devastation wasn’t the word, he didn’t understand, she had seemed like she wanted all of him. Sometimes, there’s maybe too much truth in this world and not enough understanding and he had none of that in that moment. She was why his legs almost collapsed every time that he saw her. Becoming her boy was now an impossible wish. She didn’t want him any more.

People might tell you that it’s painful to forget someone you love. Some other people might tell you that it’s painful to wait for someone you love. Everyone will get hurt by someone in the course of a relationship. Getting hurt is a part of life. It’s not easy though. She told him that he couldn’t be her everything as well as her secret.

He moved on though and he accepted it. No other choice.

Months passed and then one day, she showed up on his doorstep asking if they could go for dinner. He acquiesced, it would have been rude not to. She poured her heart out and told him that she’d made a mistake, that she wanted to be with him and that she’d do whatever it would take to be his girl.

She broke his heart that night because that was all that he’d ever wanted. The problem was that he’d promised his heart to someone else by this point and he wasn’t going to go back on his word.

Sometimes you’ve got to give up something to get something. Turns out that something else matters in your life.

@TheSamMcLeod

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