Pull me closer.

Day 11.

2018 was over in a flash. For some of us, it was a struggle from the start and for most, a year containing a swirl of emotions. Maybe 2019 can be future in the making for a chosen few. The new year, a pathway to finding out everything you need about what will make you as happy as you can be in the year ahead. We all have our favourite memories, we all have our deepest regrets about what’s gone, but can we fix them? Do we want to fix them? Sometimes you don’t get a choice, things just play out the way they want to.

There’s different cuts of people in this world. The one person that you know that nothing is ever going to happen with. The maybe someday. The almost happened, the someone that could have been forever for you, if only either of you had a bit of courage. You might have had people in your life forever, or maybe some came on your radar in 2018. A chance encounter can lead to a friendship and more, can’t it? What about the people that got away? Could a resolution be to try and get back in touch with someone? Do you ever wish you had a second chance to meet someone again for the first time? There can’t be many things worse than meeting the right person at the wrong time. Some people come into your life and you just know you’d struggle to replace them if they left. The people that we wish things had worked out with, are much more important to us than the ones we wish we’d never met.

There’s your very first kiss and the one person that got away. Maybe the two aren’t mutually exclusive? No one surely chooses to be a regret, to be a ‘what if’. Then, there are people you meet and you know that something’s going to happen between you both eventually. Can you keep them?

If circumstances dictate that things between you and someone else can’t work out, is it better to wish that you’d never met, that you’d never noticed each other?

I was doing just fine before I met you.

There was never going to be a fight that tore us apart, it was just fucking circumstance. Days, months, years go by and then suddenly one day, things change, there’s contact. We started to talk again and the feelings that went away, came back with just one smile. Getting over her was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. I don’t think I can do it again. I had let the thought of her go, far less the thought of us. It’s even more complicated now so it can only ever be glances and smiles from afar.

We’re somewhere between nothing and something.

It’s different for everyone, sometimes things make more sense the second time around. If we keep ourselves thinking about giving someone only one chance, we might lose out on something beautiful. Time can have a way of putting things back together. You’ll find each other again if that’s the way it’s supposed to be.

Maybe the faster that can you get over that one person that got away, the faster you can move onto the one that’s waiting for you.

You’re moving closer.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions

Trust is a luxury.

Day 10.

2019. The resolutions we make will be mostly for ourselves, won’t they? It’s okay to be thinking of someone else though, someone who you care about. Caring and thinking about other people is a good thing to do. Maybe pat yourself on the back if you want them to have a better year than you, or maybe just be humble and wish them nothing but the best. Much better to spread the love, right? It makes us giggle, it makes us smile and also makes us happy when we remember those moments that we shared with the special people that were in our lives in the year just gone. Sure, there’s some regret but it’s just life. It has a way of giving you an incredible high one day and then making you plummet the next.

We all have a lot to ponder in our quiet moments as the year progresses, we pay a lot of attention to our thoughts. How far we’ve come and how far we still have to go, how strong or how weak we are. You hope for good things to happen to you, whilst hoping that the worst things in your life don’t come to be. Isn’t it true that maybe the only thing that needs to change for you to have a good year is your way of thinking?

Thinking of someone else is a good way to start the year. If that person wants to be a part of your life, they will make an obvious effort to stay. It’s okay if they need to go though and be with someone else, what’s the point in reserving a place in your heart for those people who don’t want to make an effort to hang around?

Trust is a luxury.

She stood out. That’s not always easy to do in a world when there’s so much hurt going on every day. We were together forever, but on and off forever too. Intrinsically you know there are a lot of relationships that were never meant to happen but this one did. You know it might be something better and different when you don’t necessarily like someone the way that someone else does. I liked the things that she wasn’t even aware of, the way she would smile, the way she twirled her hair. The way she acted weird, the words that she could never pronounce correctly. Sometimes it’s about the story with someone and I wanted to keep on turning the pages.

Things changed because one day something happened with her. There are so many reasons to be happy, don’t all of us deserve a happy ending? Another choice to make. When you start compromising your morals, far less yourself, it’s probably time to change the people you have in your life and so it ends.

A lot of us are hopefully good people but when we have those type of relationships that go wrong, we need to find closure. You try to get rid of that relationship but isn’t it always worth mending a friendship if you get past the romantic stage? No grudges, but you cut that shit off because you know it’s gone.

You keep going though. No matter how many mistakes we make, or how we get through our lives in the year ahead, aren’t we still way ahead of everyone who isn’t trying?

No point in hating. I wish you nothing but success.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions

Take it all in your stride.

Day 9.

A new year, perhaps one of those times when you think what the next twelve months will hold for you. How lovely would it be if all of us got everything that we wanted in the year ahead? Imagine too that we all achieved all of our goals in 2019? If you’re making an important decision, isn’t it a good idea to ask if the answer that you come up with, will move you closer to your goal or farther away? If the answer is closer, you know what to do. If it’s farther away, you know that you have to make a different choice. It’s super important to know who you are, to be able to make your own decisions.

We all make some every day and those can impact on whether you have a good or a bad day. Some decisions are obviously more important than others, deciding whether or not to change job, to leave someone or to start something new with someone else. What do I want to start doing, what do I want to stop doing, what do I want to keep doing? What to eat or drink, what to wear, are easy things to think about, you almost always decide instantly about the choice that you make. A lot of us are lucky and sometimes know intrinsically what the right thing to do is, whilst others fail to decide on anything without sleeping on it first. You can’t wait too long though because maybe over time, your indecision becomes a decision. When you’re having trouble making a decision, are you making it too soon? It’s okay to be on the edge if you’re finding it difficult to decide because there are times that having a choice can spell trouble, and you don’t know if it’s your head or your heart that has the right answer. Fuck. Some of us even go out of our way when it comes to avoiding having to make a decision. Bizarrely decisive. Why though? You can make mistakes and know why you made them, but it was your choice. Every decision can bring something bad, some good and can definitely teach you some lessons.

Don’t run, don’t hide behind it. Stand up and shout about it

The troubling part right now is that a certain day is drawing closer, and it’s nearly time to choose between having the possibility of having a yesterday again, or thinking of what tomorrow could bring. That yesterday could be amazing, but what if the other choice is better in the long run, how do you choose? Perhaps the idea is to go with the choice that scares you the most, because that’s the one that’ll enhance your life more. There’s a song lyric that says that “sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.” It might just be right.

It’s okay to doubt yourself but sometimes we all have to have the courage to decide what our higher priorities are. It’s okay to say no to some things when you really need to say yes to others. Some of the bigger decisions mean that you have to explain to the people closest to you about why you’re making them. You shouldn’t have to, it’s your life, but humility is something to hold dear and you need to have a difficult conversation with them. Does there come a point when the penny drops that you can’t live your life to please others? The choices you make belong to you.

If someone has wronged you and you want to give them a second chance, you can’t hold onto the hurt that they gave you and still be happy. Forgive and forget, choose yesterday and see how things go. Time for a new start and moving on? Choose tomorrow. You look hard at your life and ask yourself plenty of questions. Can I take this leap or do I try and hold onto what I might be losing by choosing tomorrow? Will either of these choices make me grow emotionally? If it’s time to make a decision about what comes next for you, keep your fingers crossed. Living life on the edge in 2019?

Stay strong and never doubt it.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions

Your beautiful destiny.

Day 8.

One day it hits you that you’re not really a child anymore. When that time comes though is different for everyone of us. When you move out of home, maybe after your first relationship when that person breaks your heart. Perhaps you know that the end of your childhood is here when you realise that you know as much as the adults in your life do. Maybe it happens when you start looking back on things and wishing that you could change them, it’s all subjective. Whenever it is, we grow up almost overnight because we have to. A stage in your life when your innocence disappears, a time when our awareness of having to be responsible kicks in. Sucks, right? Can one of your resolutions be to try and rediscover the things that you enjoyed before you had to put on your big boy shoes?

As you grow up, you get told a shit ton of things by people, especially your parents. One is almost universally being convinced that you can do anything with your life. It’s a nice thought, but the thing is, somewhere between being a child and becoming an adult, things change, your plans change. Your parents mould your world but then one day, you get to do it all for yourself and maybe even help contribute to someone else’s. We need some advice now and again about growing up and facing all of the things that life is going to throw at us, but you can choose to take whichever piece of wisdom you get given. Don’t we all want to find that X on our own personal treasure map though?

Growing up doesn’t need to be a bad thing, it lets us find our own place in the world, to find out who we really are, and to live the life that we imagined we’d have when we were younger.

Yet as the days continue to pass, don’t you find that the dreams you had then, and the reality you have now, are miles apart? Hopefully, it’s as good as we imagined, but often it’s slightly less cool than we’d pictured. Maybe the only thing we really want back is our childhood, but you know that those days will never return, you can’t get them back.

When we were younger, it was a time when delight was the only season. Not yet proper adults, just young people living the life that makes us wistful now. Breaking curfews, getting grounded. Gatecrashing a party, kissing as many of the girls there as you wanted, or who were willing to let you, and you didn’t think anything of it. Stumbling home early in the morning, shaking your head and smirking at everyone heading to work. Everything was given to us, anything was possible, at least if you didn’t let your parents know about half of the stuff you’d been getting up to. Who would spill their secrets?

Maybe all you want to do sometimes as an adult is to get away from all of reality.

Growing old is happening to everyone but, is it possible to never grow up?

Everyone makes mistakes when we’re young, but if we counted those mistakes up against the ones we make as an adult, do any of us actually think that there were fewer when we were younger?

Growing up is difficult, because there will always be a moment when everything is a struggle. Won’t there always be a moment though when everything is perfect? Sure, you might have memories of doing some things that you won’t forget but know that you’ll never experience them again. Your life and the people in it are going to change, and the hardest part is realising that there’s nothing you can do about it.

A girl who I’m not with, but who I’ll always have love for, once went to a psychic and was asked to take photographs of the significant people in her life. She was told that I was Peter Pan and that I’d never grow up. So far, she’s been absolutely spot on. A different place will be called home this year but it won’t be Neverland.

No one likes getting older, but for some of us, maybe 2019 is the year to grow up. Maybe it’s time to go shopping for some big boy shoes.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions

Rewinding the picture.

Day 7.

Alarm, an anxious awareness of danger, a warning sound or device.

It’s the last day of the year. It’s time to say goodbye to all of the bad things in your life that happened in 2018, but perhaps it’s farewell for some of the good things too. Letting go is difficult though, isn’t it? Whether it’s a friend, a job or a relationship, it can be so hard to let go of attachments, especially if you don’t really want to, but some things are necessary. You’re moving forward, so you’re letting go of the past that was beginning to drag you down. Good on all of us that have the bravery to make that decision.

If you want to forget something or someone, there’s little point second guessing yourself about the original decision you made to let that someone or something into your life. You live and learn, isn’t that the common saying? It can be even tougher if it’s a boy or girl that you were close to but what’s the point in hating him or her? Maybe you found out he or she was doing something that they shouldn’t have been, you just know sometimes that something isn’t quite right, but when you begin to question it, their barriers go up, and so your shutters tend to come down. Not everyone’s a mystery though, lots of people are open books and sometimes you just forget how to read. Sure, your world is a tiny bit emptier with their departure, but maybe they’ve been let go to free up space for someone that you might really need in 2019. It’s okay to get to the stage where you realise that someone belonged only to your past, time to begin to accept it, as much as it might hurt to do so.

It can be cathartic, the day comes when you understand everything that you need to do, the choice that you need to make, will be the day that you stop trying to figure your shit out. Letting go isn’t a thing that you do once though, it’s something you have to do every day, over and over again. It can be obvious to yourself that, although you’re down, you’re by no means out. New year, new start?

There’s a girl who was with someone else, and then they got together. She left her ex to start something new but there was always a part of him thinking that if she could do that to him, she could do it again. There goes the alarm.

It’s hard to let go of someone he cares about and it’s even more difficult to let go of the belief in her. The disappointment of finding out someone isn’t who he thought they were will sting for a while, but it’s time to see what lies ahead from tomorrow onwards.

Should he send a message to wish her all the best for the year ahead?

When that clock chimes at midnight, if you’re tempted to text a certain someone from your past on New Year’s Eve, don’t. Nope, just don’t do it, hopefully sense kicks in, there goes the alarm again.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions

What dreams are made of.

Day 6.

Everyone has experienced one of those type of days. You wake up in the morning and you’re not motivated to do anything. Sometimes, maybe you can do nothing and laze the day away, but chances are that you still have things to be getting on with. It’s just life, but so full of duties, personal issues and responsibilities that sometimes it can be impossible to know where to start. None of us likes to admit it, but aren’t we all are struggling to get motivated from time to time? Often we simply can’t get started with doing what we need to do. It can be a daily struggle, just a circle that we can’t seem to escape. Things will change though, won’t they?

There’s an old Chinese proverb that probably nails it if you’re struggling. “Deep doubts, deep wisdom; small doubts, little wisdom.”

Doubt can be a useful thing, it keeps you guessing. Can you know the strength of yourself until you’ve been tested? What do you do to try and make things better, doubt your doubts before you doubt yourself? It’s okay, being scared about whatever you want to achieve in 2019 is natural. What’s the point in ever doubting your own instinct? Doubt everything, find your own motivation to do what you need or want to do next year. If you’ve ever met someone that’s famous or successful and you’ve managed to spend some time with them, you know intrinsically that even they have doubts, that they have fears, that they have worries. They just don’t let these feelings stop them from pushing on. Not a bad lesson to learn as a new year gets closer.

It’s tough to always be strong though, and perhaps the worst part about that to the people in your life, is that no one seems to ever ask if you’re okay. One of the problems with the world is that some people are always so certain of themselves, whilst maybe the wiser ones can be full of doubt. That’s fine, you figure out your own motivation, what’s going to make you happy. Letting someone else be a roadblock to what makes you fulfilled on your journey to your goals is stupid. Doubt will kill your dreams before failure ever will.
Show no fear, have no regrets, display no weakness. This might sound tough as this year closes but don’t waste a second of your life, it’s too short and you’re too fucking special.

We’ve all had a lot dreams growing up. Time to make some of them come true? Will there be difficulties? For sure, but these challenges will make you feel better once you get what you want to achieve.

Hard work and determination can take you where you want to go if you have an idea or a plan. Is there doubt about what lies ahead? Absolutely. Is there trepidation? You’d better believe it. What’s the point wondering about what if though? Several plans have been made, it’s your turn now. It could be a big year ahead for you if you want it to be one.

Just watch. Set, ready, go for the take off.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions

There’s nothing for me to miss.

Day 4.

“There is an end to everything, to good things as well.” It’s a quote by Chaucer that’s over 600 years old, and has changed over time, most of us now know the derived version as “All good things come to an end.”

No one likes losing good things, but maybe that loss helps you to be better in the long term. Some people will always come and go in your life but the loss of some hit harder than others. Aren’t we all tormented now and again by some past relationships? Maybe 2019 will be the year that you put her or him behind you and move on. Be honest with yourself, you can’t start the next chapter if you keep re-reading the last one.

It’s okay to miss someone, because don’t you also miss the part of you that you had when you were with them? You shared experiences and more, and now that’s gone. Maybe you shouldn’t be missing them but you feel what you feel in any given moment.

It’s funny how all the feelings you had when you were in love with someone can sit gathering dust in the back of your mind, only to come flooding out at the slightest reminder. You hear a song maybe, and it all comes back to you. Now you’re thinking about them again. Fuck. Is there much point thinking about people from your past though? Sure, there will be times when you think it’s a good idea to call them and see how they’re doing. Do you really care about how they’re doing, aren’t you just trying to get back an idea of what you had? No point hurting yourself, you liked them, but there’s a reason why they didn’t make it into your future. It hurts like hell when the person that made you feel like a million dollars one day, decides that they don’t want you the next. She chased me because she liked and wanted me. She got me, but then she left me.

From best friends to strangers.

Your friends rally round because they get it too. She made me feel like less of a man because I couldn’t give her what she wanted any more. Some friends have bizarre traditions and one that we have is to convene a tribunal if one of us is being a dick about something. There are times though that people know when to be there for you. No tribunal needed, everyone knows that the hurt is real.

It turns out that time can be a healer. Regret her? No point, she was exactly what I needed at one time and it must have been the same for her.

Maybe the biggest test comes when a boy and a girl meet after their breakup. That feeling you get when you bump into into your ex and you’re looking your best though. You still remember things, don’t you? The eyes, the smile. It happened randomly one day. We looked at each other, smiled, traded pointless words, had a hug and left. The funny thing is that one of us knew that it was a good idea that we split. In that moment, the penny drops that all we really shared was an address, a bed and a lot of lies.

She calls, but I leave it to go to voicemail. Hours later, I listen to the message and as it finishes, I hear the words, “You’ll never find someone like me.” There’s a regretful smile because that’s exactly the point. She’s the past and has nothing new to say to me any more. She ranks amongst one of the most beautiful people that I’ve let into my world but there’s not going to be an idiot ex who wants her love again. I thought I still loved her but then I realised I just love the memories of who she used to be.

Is she sorry for the way she treated me? I don’t know, but maybe I do care, even if it’s only a tiny bit. It’s a new year coming soon though so I don’t worry about that. The focus is on my own growth, maybe she’ll be the one who makes me strong.

If you’re hurting right now, be proud of your heart. It’s been broken, cheated and stabbed but it’s still working. 2019 might just be your year.

My ex? We’re not friends, we’re not enemies. This shit is dead and gone, it’s not what it used to be.

@TheSamMcLeod
#YouMeMusicLifeResolutions